January 2009. Wow.

Please excuse me while I disappear for three months! Wow! I began working at the local school district subbing in daycare nurseries for a month and then got a long-term position at the library at my son's elementary school. That was a FUN job. For real. I could have worked there forever....or at least until I was 60-something. But, alas, the librarian returned from her extended leave and the job was no longer mine. It was fun while it lasted.

I have to say...working at the district and trying to get hired for permanent positions opened my mind to some things:

Number One is that I really need to complete that ONE CLASS I need to obtain my AA Degree. One class, people. What have I been waiting for? Whatever it was...it's long overdue and the time is now. Or at least real soon. I'm going to go to our local community college this week to see a counselor, figure out what class I need and then TAKE THE CLASS. It just needs to be done. I know an AA isn't "all that"...but it IS better than nothing. It's also necessary for some of the better paying positions within the district. Not having it made me ineligible for some jobs that I KNOW I could have done.

Number Two eye opener is that I don't know that I'm supposed to even GET a job. I thought it was a good idea. Extra income, medical benefits for the family (we currently buy them ourselves because we're self-employed) and a retirement plan. While it is a great plan...I don't know that it's God's plan. And I just really want to be in His will. And more often than not what feels right is being home and taking care of my family...being at the shop and taking care of the bookkeeping for my husband...being available to help others when necessary. These are the things I'm SURE of.

My husband and I have always dreamed of having acreage. And we are thinking that now is the time to try and make that dream a reality. And if we do have acreage...I'm going to want animals. Chickens in particular. Nothing like fresh eggs. And goats...gotta keep the weeds down. And maybe an alpaca...because they're beautiful and sweet and great "guard dogs". Having acreage will also allow me to finally have that big, beautiful garden I've always dreamed of....room enough to grow plenty to eat and plenty to put by. And I just got an idea today to sell gourmet mushrooms at my local farmer's market...it would be a first and worth a try. Who knows...maybe I could even sell to local restaurants, eventually!

As usual, my mind is racing with the possibilities. And going to work every day really puts a damper on all of that. I mean, I understand that we need to work. I worked since I was 16 years old until my second son was born. I know how to work..and I understand it's importance. I'm not saying I won't work. I'm saying that if I have a choice...and at this point I still do...I would rather work for myself doing something rewarding, creative and pure. Growing food...making art...raising chickens...maybe enough to sell eggs as well as mushrooms...wouldn't that make for a beautiful farmer's market booth? Gorgeous gourmet mushrooms...beautiful green, blue and brown eggs...all displayed in wooden crates and chunky baskets...I could use one of my vintage scales to weigh out the goods...I can see it so clearly!

God's will. Not mine. You lead, I will follow. You open the doors, I'll walk through. I trust You.